There was this case in this hospital’s Intensive Care ward where patients always died in the same bed on Friday mornings around 9am regardless of their age, gender, medical history or medical condition.
This puzzled the doctors and some even thought that it had to do with the supernatural: Why did death occur at that same bed around the same time every Friday?
Dorothy was very upset because her husband Albert had just passed away.
She goes to the mortuary to look at her dearly departed, and the instant she sees him she starts wailing and crying.
One of the attendants rushes up to comfort her. Through her tears she explains that she was upset because Albert was wearing a black suit and that it was his dying wish to be buried in a blue suit.
Three patients in a mental institution prepare for an examination given by the head psychiatrist.
If the patients pass the exam, they will be free to leave the hospital. However, if they fail, the institution will detain them for seven years.
The doctor takes the three patients to the top of a diving board overlooking an empty swimming pool, and asks the first patient to jump.
Dear Child,
I am writing this slow because I know that you can’t read fast.
We don’t live where we did when you left home.
Your dad read in the paper that most accidents happen within 20 miles from your home so we moved.
I won’t be able to send you the address, as the last family that lived here took the house numbers when they left so that they wouldn’t have to change their address.
A young man shopping in a supermarket noticed a little old lady following him around. If he stopped, she stopped. Furthermore she kept staring at him.
She finally overtook him at the checkout, and she turned to him and said, “I hope I haven’t made you feel ill at ease; it’s just that you look so much like my late son.”
Do not sleep at night. Hence, you do not have to worry about getting up early in morning and to rush for job.
Do not take shower rather use deodorants and perfume to avoid public embarrassment.
Use the top and the bottom part simultaneously. I mean that eat and excrete simultaneously. However, if you think it is an obnoxious idea, then do reading rather than eating.
Brush your teeth while taking bath.
While sleeping, wear your shoes, this will save time in morning.
If possible, wear your office dress in night.
Hire servants who will do everything for you.
Wear your clothes while traveling.
Buy a car.
Finally yet importantly, do not leave your office in evening. Therefore, you will not have to worry about coming back.
Moving along a dimly lighted street, a friend of ours was suddenly approached by a stranger who had slipped from the shadows nearby.
‘Please, sir,’ asked the stranger, ‘would you be so kind as to help a poor unfortunate fellow who is hungry and out of work? All I have in the world is this gun.’ 